NOAA: “Mermaids Do Not Exist”

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Courtesy: Walt Disney Pictures

Sorry guys, it appears there’s nothing “Under the Sea” after all.

According to CBS News, the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration has issued a report stating that there are no such things as mermaids.

Technically they wouldn’t even call them mermaids. Instead they called them “Aquatic Humanoids”. Most readers at this point are wondering why NOAA felt this report was necessary. It’s because of a new television show on Animal Planet called “Mermaids: The Body Found,” while the show is fictional it’s filmed in a “documentary-style” format. As a result, some viewers are now starting to question whether mermaids could exist.

According to the Discovery Channel, the show faked footage sprinkled with bits of scientific speculation.

“As with all good science fiction, there’s a grain of science and truth to it: the so-called “aquatic ape” idea it touted (suggesting our evolutionary ancestors may have lived in marine environments) is a real hypothesis, but has nothing to do with mermaids,” they wrote.

However in NOAA’s news release they do not elaborate on exactly why the theory of mermaids is false, other than mentioning the fact that no evidence of aquatic humanoids has ever been found.

Therefore mermaid fans can remain optimistic, because that means if you could somehow find and catch a mermaid, showing they exist you could prove NOAA wrong.

For the mermaid skeptics this report will hopefully affirm the lack of mermaid existence. However avid mermaid fans will likely now be grabbing their nets, because if there’s anything a good fisherman likes it’s a challenge.

Now watching the Little Mermaid will never be the same for me.